The more stuff we have the more we want, until we eventually become no more than the accumulation of all our stuff - shallow vessels of wants and desires. The more stuff we have around and in our daily activities, the more likely we are to be stressed. 

The more we have, the more we have to take care of and then we need to earn more money to maintain and take care of all the stuff. The more stuff we have the more bins, containers, boxes, and storage solutions we need. Big Box & Container stores have created a whole industry out of it as proof.  

Unfortunately, the more stuff we have, whether in our home or packed into our thoughts, the less peace and spaciousness we experience. 

We should be living that simple life but we have traded it for a life full of stress and business and trying to get more stuff, and keeping all that stuff for ourselves. We have convinced ourselves that the more stuff we have the more successful we are.

We tell ourselves that we need big houses to hold all of our stuff and big cars to transport our stuff. Then we buy houses we cannot afford and lease cars that will never be ours. As a result, we spend most of our money on credit card payments for all that stuff.

We have so much stuff we don’t even use that we buy pressboard furniture to store it in. Why? It’s because we don’t have room for it all. We are so stuck in the vicious cycle of “more stuff” we don’t take the time to reflect on it. 

Truth-be-told, the more stuff we have the more time it takes to manage it all. In all probability,  the single greatest anchor that keeps people weighed down is the encumbrance of "stuff", you know, all that crap we accumulate because we are conditioned to believe that the more stuff we have the more successful we must be or the happier we will be. 

In fact, the more stuff we have, the more likely our mind will be consumed with thoughts about that stuff – what to do with it, how to take care of it, how not to lose it. And, we will be moved further and further from a sense of fullness and abundance. What we have to remember is that the more stuff we have and/or want, the more we are slaves to it. 

Do we truly need all that stuff?

For the longest time, Christmas was my favorite time of year. A lot has changed since then and my thoughts and feelings have matured. I continue to love the sights and sounds of the season, but I have a different outlook on it. Christmas is not just about trees and homes lavishly decorated from top to bottom with twinkling lights, glittering ornaments, and bow-strung-garland. It is remembering Jesus Christ's birth and honoring it. 

Christmas time finds many people travelling great distances to come home to be with family and friends. It is a time for love, and sharing. It is a time to come together with loved ones to celebrate the season with pure hearts and giving spirits and to enjoy each other's company. For many others, this is one of the only times they will go to church together.

Christmas is both a holiday and a holy day. Christmas is for giving love, companionship and laughter. Christmas is for giving -- period. It is about the only time of year some of us get to see relatives outside our immediate family. Christmas is about making memories, the kind that last forever. 

Most of all Christmas is the perfect time to give thanks for our blessings. With the year almost over we can look back and give special thanks for the blessings that brought us through to the present. Another wonderful thing I’ve learned is that Christmas is a time to forgive and forget.  It is the ideal time to let go of perceived injustices and end the year with a clean slate and a clean heart. Being thankful and forgiving is a blessing for us and for  those we forgive.  

Spreading joy and happiness is the best thing we can do for ourselves and for others at Christmas. Many of us have a few family traditions that we love. Personally, my grown kids and I still go hang out with their grandmothers on Christmas Eve and Christmas day. The grandmothers love it!  They get the biggest kick out of being waited on ‘hand-and-foot’. “Bring me a little dressing, would you get me a glass of punch, bring me a piece of pie while you’re in the kitchen”, is the cry of the day. They know they can ask and receive without any “lip”.

Whether you are looking forward to the yuletide festivities or just a time to relax, Christmas is welcomed each and every year.  And let us remember, the joyous gift of Christmas is God's gift to us – His Son, Jesus. 

Last week I ran into a friend I hadn’t seen for many years. We lost touch when we both married and moved. Excited happy and glad to have bumped into each other again, we took our re-union to the nearest restaurant to chat some more and catch up. Ten minutes into our meet-up, I realized why we hadn’t stayed in touch, why I hadn’t looked her up.

Every other sentence out of her mouth was a complaint or a negative comment. Her husband doesn’t treat her right, her kids don’t call and visit her as much as they should, her doctor doesn’t believe her when she says she’s sick, and on and on and on. Not one good thing spewed forth from her lips.

Twenty minutes later I glanced quickly at my watch, gasped for breath and, excused myself. I had to go. The whole encounter had me on the verge of a major depressive attack. It started me thinking about negative and insecure people.

I find that insecure and/or negative people are extremely needy and miserable people to be around. They are that way for a lot of reasons. Many insecure people may have been raised in a chaotic, unpredictable or volatile environment in which they were kept off balance, on guard or on edge. Some turn inward, becoming self-obsessed – “It’s all about me.” They typically have unrealistic expectations and sometimes unconsciously overcompensate for their poor self-image by thinking they're better than other people.

Negative/insecure people will often insult or bully others to make themselves feel better.  They tend to be very defensive and cannot handle criticism. They usually find scapegoats for their problems, never realizing that they are causing the problems themselves. Also, they tend to point out the shortcomings of others, even if untrue, in order to cover up for their own perceived inadequacies. 

In the end I concluded that “Not all insecure people are haters, but all haters are insecure people.” 

What do you think happens to make them that way? Can anything be done for them? Do you know any negative or insecure people? How do you handle it/them?